Mumbai: In a corporate strategy that has amazed the marketing pundits, a leading corporate hospital has announced massive discounts for politicians on pre-election fitness check up.
The Quackdoc Hospital spokesperson Dr. Mohit Garg said, “Similar to the pre-operative fitness by the anesthetist and cardiologist, with the media hype for the upcoming Delhi & Jammu Kashmir 2014 election, our core committee decided that it would be in the best financial interest of the hospital and also the country if we could provide fitness check up for our aged, retarded politicians at a cheap price.”
Senior Congress leader Digvijay Singh who was roped in as the brand ambassador for his persistent, perennial nonsensical remarks and comments making him the ideal candidate for a check up green flagged the pilot project with his own ophthalmic examination after he recently complained of seeing most women as ‘tunch maal’.
“There were allegations by a section of the media that I suffer from a disease called Digvijay Singh. People ridiculed me for my statements often saying that they were written by Kapil Sibbal, but when I come out clean after my fitness check up, all will know that my talent is truly God gifted. I will strongly recommend this hospital to party high command and Rahul baba too”, he said.
Senior BJP leader L.K.Advani who was second in que opted for Electromyography-Nerve conduction study and signed up for the sports medicine department membership saying he even though he could not become Prime Minister, he was now in the race for the Delhi Chief Minister candidature in the upcoming elections.
With the news spreading fast and Shiv Sena babus too flocking for the discounted fitness check up, our ‘Gupt Samwadata’ Tushar Malwade asked party supremo Uddhav Thackeray on how he planned to settle the hospital bill. “We have saved just about enough money allotted by BMC for filling the potholes on Mumbai Roads,” he replied.