The smile on my face as I write this post is a coverup for the only regret I have in life. Some readers might not appreciate it, some might call me foolish, or negative in thought. But the fact remains that every individual wants to lead a life of his/her liking and a constant introspection and retrospection is a normal Human nature.
As a look back at the glorious 25 years of my life, I realize that I have learned a lot, met some exceptional people, gained respect, applause. Suddenly it has struck me that by the time I would have completed my Masters degree (a must in today’s competitive world), I would be 4.5 years behind my “Non Medico” colleagues from school which makes me sad (1 year repeat after 12th, 1.5 years extra MBBS duration compared to other Under graduation courses, 2 years for Masters entrance exam preparation).
Remembering school days, I was always brilliant with Mathematics and Accounts, worked very hard, stood among the toppers, was an ideal student. With time not by my side “financially and personally” in 2002, I had become obsessed about fulfilling my parents dream of “Seeing both children as Doctors”, never thought what was best suited for me as per my aptitude.
Yes, Today, I’m a good physician, loving ,caring towards my patients, providing them quality, ethical medical care for a MBBS level doctor (unlike rampant unethical practices in our profession, “Aamir you are right to a certain extent”). But the 4.5 year thought has certainly disturbed me. Today, after all these years, I feel that I would have been better off had I opted for commerce after 10th and become a Charted Accountant instead with similar amount of hard work I put into medicine, a reality I’m not ashamed to accept. Medical profession really takes a toll on your bachelorhood, health, family and social responsibilities. The fruits may be sweet later, but the latent period is considerably long.
Well, all is well now and I’m glad I’m into the only thing I was ever passionate about from medical college days, “Emergency Medicine”. I love my job, my place of work, my friends here and of course treating the educated patients who are pleasure to meet ( & some “nautanki”, rich, pain in the ass patients too). 2012 will be my last attempt at MBA/MHA to get into the best business schools (aiming for IIMs, ISB, SP Jain, TISS and few others only) to move to non clinical / hospital administration field, or else it will be MEM (Masters in Emergency Medicine) from July 2013 at KDAH.
The 4.5 years are never going to come back, but the happy realization has given me a new zeal and motivation to study harder. I’m keeping my fingers crossed for now, giving it everything I have got. Next few months are crucial.
Its ok dude everybody goes through that phase while in medicine, u always question ur decision to pursue it, callin it a big mistake would be 2 pessimistic, bt wld say that u hv no idea wat u r gettin into, and after u r in u jst get more sucked into it…bt u always have other options..follow wat ur heart says..best of luck 4 ur future…who knows years down the line u mite b totally happy wit ur decision…nd ya i agree aamir khan was 80% right, par as they say 'sachai kadvi hoti hai', even for doctors truth doesnt taste sweet
I liked the way you have honestly written in your blog. Not a lot of people can publicly accept that they are not quite happy about their career. Very well written [:)] and don't lose hope, it all works out fine in the end [:)]